We got our first BFP on Clo mid in September 2009 after ttc since January 2008. Our dreams came crashing down when we miscarried in October. I was 6.5 weeks along. February 2010 brought another BFP, followed quickly by miscarriage #2 at 4.5 weeks. I am currently trying to pick up the pieces of my broken heart and get some answers to why my body doesn't want to stay pregnant. Clo mid was my magic potion for getting prego, now I just need to find the magic elixir to keep that pregnancy for 9 months. I am meeting with a multiple pregnancy loss maternal fetal medicine Dr. for the first time on Tuesday.
An update for my faithful readers: I have been working night and day on cheering myself up. I have successfully kept myself busy enough to keep the crying to a minimum. Either that, or I am just in denial. Either way, here is what I have been cheering myself up with...
- hosting a Valentines day brunch for my mom and sisters
- buying myself flowers, and getting roses from my DH
- girls night
- reading reading reading
- movie: Valentines day
- shopping
- pedicure
- road trip to find the sun...we found it and it still exists
- movie: When in Rome
- eating treats, lots of treats (I really need to stop that!)
- making an appointment with MFM Dr., I'm really excited to get some answers and come up with a plan.
- did I mention I have been eating lots of treats??
I am doing much better with this miscarriage then I did with the last one. I think much of that is because my heart was guarded with this pregnancy and I didn't give the whole thing to it for fear of it being smashed into a million pieces again. I hope I can feel safe enough to give my whole heart to this dream, but right now I am trying to protect it. I thank you all for your kind words. I could really feel the love and support from you all. I hope I can pay it forward to those in need.
PS...Today is my birthday. Go out and eat come cake to celebrate since it is my favorite food! I know I will be!
28 comments:
Happy Birthday! I hope you have a great day! And may this year be filled with much happiness and joy.
Happy Birthday! I really hope the mfm doctor has some answers for you. I like this list of things that are helping you to be happy. What was the valentines movie about? Just different peoples stories about vday?
Happy Birthday! I am sorry for all that you have been through. I hope that the appt on the 23rd will help provide some answers and bring you happiness in the near future. I hope you enjoyed your birthday cake and treats!!!
Happy Birthday!! You sound like your doing a great job of keeping yourself body & brain busy.
delurking to say happy birthday!
and that i recently found your blog.
im so very sorry about your miscarriages.
im hoping that your meeting with the new doctor helps you find some answers and points you in the right direction for TTC!
xoxo
lisa
What a great day to have a birthday, it's my wedding anniversary! I hope you have a great day and here's to getting some answers!
Happy Birthday! Hope you get some answers so next year is even happier! :)
Happy b-day! I want to see both of those movies that you saw. And I'd also like to eat a bunch of treats while I'm watching them. Raisinets are my fave movie candy. Chocolate-dipped sunshine. =) Yum!
Wouldn't it be neat to see movies while getting mani's and pedi's (and eating candy)?
Super BIG HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! hope that tuesday gets you some answers. will be keeping you in my thoughts. it is great that you are keeping your spirits up.
ILCW
Happy Birthday! I have been eating way too many treats too; it's just so much fun :). I hope your MFM appt goes well.
Oh, Happy Birthday! Hope you've had a great one.
So sorry to hear about your miscarriages. My heart goes out to you.
ICLW
iwillbeamom.blogspot.com
Happy Bday! I'm so sad to hear of your other news. Stay strong and hang in there. I hope there are some answers.
ICLW
Treats are good. They don't unbreak what's broken, but random acts of kindness to the self are pretty darned important. I'm so very sorry for your losses. And I hope that your appointment brings you some answers.
ICLW
Happy Birthday!! I hope you had an awesome day! Mmm treats, I had custard last night & it was oh so good that I'm tempted to get another one today lol.
Glad you're doing OK, you've been on my mind lately. Hope your day was a good one!
Happy Birthday! I'm glad to hear you have been being good to yourself, you deserve it. Good luck with the doctor, I hope they can help you find some answers.
Your list of things making you happy is great!! I do some of them myself daily!
Happy Belated Birthday!!
ICLW
Happy Birthday and good luck at your MFM appointment!
~ICLW
Happy Belated Birthday! Give yourself a hug for me. Glad you've got an appointment and hoping for some answers. Keep your chin up. (I saw both of those movies... liked "When in Rome" better, but V-day wasn't as great as I'd hoped). ;o)
Happy belated birthday! I pray this year has lots of good things in store for you.
Happy belated bday!!! I'm so sorry to read about your losses, I know how devastating it can be. Hang in there, and way to focus on the positives!!
Happy ICLW!
Happy Birthday & Happy ICLW!!!! Sorry about your loses & I pray for a successful pregnancy in your near future.
Happy Birthday & ICWL:) Glad to hear you're finding things that bring you joy & treating yourself...you deserve it!
Happy Birthday!! I'm happy to hear the positives things you're trying to focus on. You're being so strong in a very heard situation. I hope the doc has a great plan for you.
Happy Birthday! I'm glad you seem to be on the mend and on your way to getting some answers very soon. Take care of yourself and don't worry too much about the treats, you can walk them off later!!
Happy Belated Birthday, it's great to see that you've found positive things to focus on.
Stopping by for ICLW
I am so late in commenting! I hope your birthday was a happy one :) I love your cheer up ideas :) You have been in my prayers as you heal from your miscarriage and seek out medical docs who can address this problem!!
A belated happy birthday :)
Good on you for taking the time to treat yourself. Hoping that the MFM can give you some answers and get you staying pregnant.
{ICLW}
Belated Happy Birthday!
I'm sorry that you have been through what you have. I experienced a miscarriage in December at 12 weeks and it has not been an easy thing to get through. Still, we want a baby so we keep movin' forward. Seems you are finding ways to do the same. Like you, reading is a big thing for me. I do it a lot.
Best of luck to you in your journey!
Post a Comment