How do I always get here? Weeks without posting, feeling guilty about it, and having to try and remember everything to update. Boo on me!
My latest dilemma...
I took a non design related position about a 6 weeks ago. My unemployment was running out and the market for designers hadn't even started to go up. In taking this job I took a 35% cut in pay. This was not easy for me to do. Once you work for a certain pay amount, it is hard to take less then that. I have really been enjoying my job and find that my days go fast and the work is fun. I also have Fridays off which is wonderful.
On Friday I checked my email and had an email from a commercial furniture dealership saying that they were hiring another designer and wanted to meet with me. I interviewed with them yesterday and am now waiting to hear. I am so torn about this.
Getting this job would put me back into my field, doing what I love and getting paid a lot better. It would also take away wearing jeans to work and having Friday off. It would also add pressure and overtime, but the pay would be MUCH better.
I think the biggest hangup I have to this new position is that it feels more like a career. I don't want a career, I want to be a mom. I want to spend my days taking my kids to the park, seeing the animals at the zoo, playing in the snow, just savoring every mom moment. Taking a "career" job some how makes me feel like I would be farther away from that goal.
I know my success in having a baby doesn't matter where I am working. I can leave one company just as easy as another. I have tried to explain this feeling to my mom and husband, but they don't get it. They can't see why I wouldn't be excited about a job that I like to do and that pays well.
Am I just crazy or has anyone else felt this way? I guess right now I don't want anything that feels farther away from my dream. But dreams don't always come true....
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8 comments:
I don't understand compleatly, but I do know that I had a melt down when I was filling out applications to teach this next school year. My husband asked what was wrong... I responed "I shouldn't have to be worrying about where I'm going to teach next year, I should be 7 months pregnant when school starts, and getting ready for our baby". I won't lie, it hurt more then a little when he tried to help by saying 'well, that's just not our reality right now'. I hope you can find an answer that brings you peace.
Take the job!! When you have your baby, it will be easy to quit and in the meantime you'll enjoy your work and make lots of money :)
I would probably take the job if you get an offer!! Of course we are all praying that we become moms SOON but none of us know how long it will be until God blesses us that way. I feel the same way when making decisions that do not include any children, but I think no matter how much it hurts, we have to live in the present...
I would also take the job! You might as we ll enjoy what you are doing while you wait to be a SAHM. GL!!!
It would be easy to take a job that pays more (or what you were making), BUT, you have to think about the stress level. In working more overtime, how will that affect your stress and your work/life balance?
I took a big paycut last year because the job was way too stressful and it wasn't worth it anymore. I didn't want a career in that field and like you, I just wanted to be a mom. I knew the stress wasn't helping us TTC either. A year later, I'm still not a mom, but I am much happier with my work/life balance.
I think you have to figure out what your financial situation is and if you NEED to make more money, then take the job. If you are doing okay, then keep the current job (for your own sanity). And who doesn't like having Fridays off??!!
Just my opinion. Good luck!
It's a hard position. I would go with what you enjoy. You don't want to be over stressed though. Go with what you believe is the right thing.
I feel totally the same way. I was recently laid off and every time my husband brings up looking for a job, I burst into tears. It feels like if I get back into a big ol' law firm, that I've given up on being a mother. I don't want to be a lawyer, I want to be a mom. I know they're not mutually exclusive, but it feels like that to me.
It is a hard position you are in. Make the best one for you and everthing will work out!
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