...I meet with my OBGYN for my "Post Miscarriage" appointment. I am really not excited for this.
First off, my Dr's office happens to be on the main floor of the hospitals Women's Tower which equals pregnant ladies EVERYWHERE, and babies and people bringing flowers and balloons and excitement in the air. It about kills me. There is only one time where I walked into that building happy and didn't cry my entire ride home, but then I miscarried the next day.
Secondly, I don't want to be an emotional wreck with my Dr. and then not get all my questions and concerns answered. I want to know what some of the reasons I could have miscarried are and what we can do in the future to try and prevent it. I want to know if we are going to go back to Clo mid or if she is going to want to see if being pregnant fixed my inability to ovulate and try ttc all natural again.
Third, I am worried she will tell me I can start trying right away...what if I am not ready. I am worried she will tell me I have to wait a couple of months...what if I am ready, and 3 more months without a baby is so hard to hear.
Lastly, I am afraid I don't know all the questions and concerns I have. I have never done this before and I feel like my grief has gotten in the way of some of my rational thinking. Please share your expertise.
Please hold my hand across cyber space tomorrow - 11:30 am MST.
XOXO!
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13 hours ago
23 comments:
Sure thing! Holding hands. Good luck!
Good luck with your appointment, I hope it goes well. Holding hands.
I know that this appointment sucks. There is no way around that. Write your questions down! The nurses always laugh, because I have a notebook that I take notes in, (what my scans show, what drugs I start when, etc) and that I write questions for my doctors between appointments. Ask if she is planning on doing any type of blood work to help determine the reason for the loss. Ask her how long you 'should' wait physically (some friends of mine have been told to wait, I could start trying right away). Emotionally is a whole other story! Only you and your husband can decide that. I know that for the first few weeks, I didn't even want to make love, but eventually I did, for US, not to make a baby. Don't rush it. I'll keep thinking on it, but a I always ask, "What’s next". It helps me plan for the what if's (which is imposable, but that doesn't stop me!)
I will definitely be thinking about you tomorrow. I definitely recommend writing down your questions ahead of time so if you get emotional during the appointment you'll have something to refer to. Stay strong.
Definitely holding hands girl! I agree with the comment above me - write down your questions. I didn't do that and totally forgot what to ask. My doctor also told me I could start right away. Praying for you!
First, I really wish I could give you a big hug. There isn’t anything to say to make this easier. Second, sorry if my advice is very “clinical” in nature. I’m in a rush and wanted to get this typed and I really wish I wasn’t such an expert on the post-m/c doctor’s visit.
1. She will probably tell you that medically you need to wait either 1 or 2 cycles (some doctor’s differ on this) before you try (I don’t think this includes your miscarriage bleeding; so once you have CD1 again, that will be your 1st break cycle); however, emotionally only you know when you are ready; Medically, it is best to wait at least 1 cycle (& up to 2) before trying again to make sure the lining it able to properly sustain a pregnancy. Emotionally . . . again, only you and DH can decide this.
2. Ask if you can have genetic/chromosome testing, blood clotting disorder testing, etc. Some doctors want to wait until you have 2 or 3 m/c (and some insurance won’t pay until then). Good to go ahead and ask just to see. Blood clotting is so easy to prevent and so easy to test for. Chromosome testing will see if there is some combination b/w your DH & you that could potentially cause a problem. Also, ask if the ttc cycle breaks include the m/c bleeding as a cycle or not just to confirm.
3. Ask if on the next TTC cycle you can start progesterone blood test early on (like day 21 or 7 dpo). I know you had this, but also open up the discussion about having progesterone supplements if the number appears low. Most REs like the 7dpo P4 number to be over 15 on a medicated (clomid, etc.) cycle; over 10 on an un-medicated cycle. (Again, doctors differ). If there is low progesterone, daily vaginal supplements may be able help.
4. More often than not, she will tell you that m/c are unfortunately very common and there isn’t always a known reason. She may say that it’s nature’s way of getting rid of a bad egg that wouldn’t going to develop properly or a chromosome defect (again, why chromosome testing for you and your husband would be good). This is true, but hard to hear. Also, and brace yourself for this one, she may say that it is good because we now we know you can get pregnant. Another thing that is true, but hard to hear.
Again, I hope you get all your questions answered and are able to leave there with some kind of peace.
One day at a time.
Good luck with your appt. I will be thinking of you. And I agree with everyone; I always take questions written down with me.
*hugs* I'm sorry. I agree with your other noter about writing your questions down. If she tells you you can try and your not ready, you don't have to try until your ready. Just do things on your own time.
I'll be thinking of you tomorrow and hope you'll share how it goes with your blog readers!
Ann's suggestions for questions are excellent and I will also chime in to say that writing questions down is absolutely key- I've taken to keeping a list in my phone as I think of questions all the time. This way I have them with me in one place. Good luck tomorrow!
I got emotional just going in for an HSG, I can't imagine how difficult this appointment would be. I think it's a great idea to write down your questions, as the other commenters suggested.
I'll be thinking of you tomorrow. Stay strong and a hug to you.
Good luck tomorrow. Just remember, you guys should start trying when you are both ready. If the Dr gives you the go ahead now, dont have any pressure to start it if you arent ready.
I was scared to death to try again after we lost our baby, but the time came pretty quick when I felt it was the right thing to do.
I hope after tomorrow you will be able to have a hopefully outlook on the future.
I'll be thinking about you tomorrow. You are in my prayers. I'm with everyone else-I always write down my questions and take to the doctor's office.
I'm sorry you have to go through the appointment. It might help to write down your questions and bring the list. *Hugs*
Will definitely be holding your hand through cyberspace! I hope you get the answers that you need! FX for answers and the plan that gives you flexibility to move forward when you're ready.
(((HUGS)))
Holding your hand tightly and sending lots of good thoughts.
Holding your hand. Thinking about you today.
Definitely holding your hand!! And praying for you!!
Thinking of you today; holding your hand - don't worry about squeezing.
thinking of you and giving your hand a squeeze!
Just wanted you to know that I was thinking about you this morning.
Was thinking about you this morning, and hoping your appointment went well.
You are definitely in my prayers dear. I hope that you are able to get the answers you need from your doctor and the clarity you need to figure out how you want to proceed.
My heart breaks for you. I'm sending hugs through the computer screen. I know it's hard to find ANYTHING positive in this, but keep your chin up: Now you know you CAN get pregnant! Next time you and your doc will be armed with even more info and it will stick, stick, stick!
Hang in there!!
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